Kamiya Dojo's Mystery
by Hana Himura
Summary: A crime has happened. Will Saitou be able to find out who is behind it? Or are the Kamiya Dojo's inhabitants smarter than him? COMPLETED
1. Yahiko

Saitou was having a good time torturing his subordinates, when he got a note from the Kamiya dojo.

"What the hell?" He said, as his eyes scanned the note. His subordinates let out a sigh of relief when he left the police station at full speed.

Disclaimer: Yeah! I make tons of money writing fanfictions! Come on! You know I'm joking! Who would pay for it? It's just for fun. So I guess you already know by now that I don't own Rurouni Kenshin... If I did, probably it wouldn't be such a huge success, because let's face it... I would probably make a comedy out of it... And it would have so much Kenshin+Kaoru waff that everybody would probably mistake it for some kind of hentai magazine.

Oh! This is a K+K fic... Well not exaclty, but trust me... There will be plenty of K+K later on.

================  
"Dialogs"  
'Thoughts'  
[Saitou's comments/questions]  
*** change of scene to someone's point of view***  
================

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery  
Part 1: Yahiko

By Hana Himura

Saitou arrived at the crime scene only minutes after receiving the note. The dojo seemed as regular as it has always been, except for the few police officers on the yard.

"We have separated the witnesses, sir." Said one of the police officers.

"Good." Saitou said. "Where are they?"

"The little boy is just inside the dojo. We are keeping the four adults shut on other rooms."

Saitou went towards the dojo. The little kid should be the easier nut to crack. Inside the dojo, he met a very bored Yahiko.

"So..." Saitou began, lighting his cigarette. "Why don't you tell me what happened here?"

"I'm not going to say a word." Yahiko said, very calm for a boy standing before a police officer.

"You better start talking now, or things will be worse for your friend." Saitou bluffed.

Yahiko thought for a moment, then he let out a sigh.

"What do you want to know?" Yahiko asked.

"Everything."

"It all started yesterday morning." Yahiko began.

***Yahiko's POV***

I woke up as soon as always, which meant Busu wasn't supose to be up yet... Or so I thought, because I went to get a bucket of water to throw at her... Trust me, it's the only way to wake her up in the morning.

So I went to her room and she wasn't there. The weirdest part was that her futon was on the middle of the room and it didn't look like someone had slept on it.

So, I went to Kenshin's room and knocked on the door.

[Why did you knock on his door?]

Well, I'm not a savage, you know! You should always knock on other people's door before coming in, specially if they might have company.

[What I meant was: why his door?]

Oh! Sorry. I just had my suspicions... And actually, the only reason I knocked was because of it. Can you imagine if I go in Kenshin's room and find the Busu in there? Worse than that, what if she was there doing something only married people are suppose to do? I'm just a kid, I don't wanna go blind or something after seeing something as disgusting as that!

[So, the Tanuki and Kenshin are... Behaving like married people?]

HELL, NO! Well... At least I hope not.

May I continue?

[Go ahead.]

Kenshin told me to come in. It turns out that he was just sick and that was why he wasn't up yet. That would explain why Kaoru wasn't sleeping on her room. She could have stayed up all night and taken care of him. But when I asked:

"Kenshin, where is Busu?"

Kenshin answered:

"Sessha does not know that."

So I kept looking for her. About twenty minutes later, Sano showed up:

"Did you lose something?" Sano asked me.

"I can't find Busu anywhere."

"Did you look in Kenshin's room?" Sano grinned and poked me on the ribs.

"Kenshin is sick."

"Oh, no! This is bad!" Sano said, and I was almost sure he was sorry because he wouldn't be able to get a free meal.

"And you know what is the weirdest part? Kaoru's futon didn't look like someone had slept on it!"

"KAMI-SAMA! JOU-CHAN IS HAVING AN AFFAIR!" Sano snapped. "SHE IS CHEATING ON KENSHIN!"

We looked at each other and said:

"Nah!" At the same time.

[Why couldn't she be having an affair?]

It's just so not like Busu... She is still trying to get Kenshin to tell her that he loves her... Come on... It will take her forever. Everybody knows they love each other... Everybody but them.

[What happened then?]

I was walking back to the kitchen and Kaoru walked out her room, like nothing had happened. I decided to play a little trick on her, so I said:

"Hey, Kaoru! Where were you last night?"

She turned pink, then red, then blue... I guess she held her breath for a while.

"I...? I... Was just in my room... As usually."

"No, you weren't."

But Busu thought she should say something smart so I would stop teasing her.

"But why would you go to my room on the first place?" She asked.

"Well... I went to get you... Kenshin is sick."

"Kenshin is sick?"

Kaoru ran to Kenshin's room as if she had practiced the Hiten Mitsurugi with Hiko her entire life... Boy, she was fast! Well, she went in Kenshin's room and closed the door. I heard some "Kenshin no Baka!". About twenty minutes later she left his room and went into the kitchen to make lunch. Then I left to the Akabeko, 'cause I'm too young to die from indigestion after eating that poison she calls food.

I spent the rest of the day at the Akabeko, helping Tae-san. I met Sano there and he said we should do Kenshin a favor and find out who Kaoru was doing... I MEAN! **WHAT** KAORU WAS DOING THAT SHE WASN'T ON HER ROOM!

So, we sneaked into the dojo... So no one would notice us... And we kept a stake out, but Kaoru never left her room that night... So we gave up and I went to sleep. When I woke up this morning, the police officers were already here.

[So, you have no idea of what happened here?]

No... What happened? The officers wouldn't tell me.

[You will find out soon enough.]

#################################################

Preview!

Next Chapter: Sano P.O.V. on what happened.

"Stop being such a child and tell me what happened!" Calling the kid a child has always worked to make him do things he doesn't wanna do. Well, this time he really wanted to tell me what had happened, he just didn't know where to start.

"I saw something." Yahiko said. I was beginning to think he had sneaked out of his room and found Kenshin or Kaoru, or Kenshin **and** Kaoru doing grown-up stuff.

#################################################

Hello minna-san!

I know I said I wouldn't be trying to make another funny fic... It's just that this idea poped in my head and I couldn't just ignore it. Next chapter has already been writen, but I'll wait for a few reviews before I post it... So please REVIEW! Oh! There will be K+K stuff later on...


	2. Sanosuke

Saitou opened the door of the first room, just to feel terribly annoyed after.

"So, here you are." Saitou said, closing the door after himself. "Let's just get this over with."

================

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin... Yeah, I know... Life is not fair...

================  
"Dialogs"  
'Thoughts'  
[Saitou's comments/questions]  
*** change of scene to someone's point of view***  
================

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery

Part 2: Sanosuke

By Hana Himura

"Let's fight!" Sano shouted at Saitou.

"I can't fight you. I'm on duty. Let's make a deal... You tell me everything that happened and as soon as this is over I'll fight you." Saitou said, pulling another cigarette.

"Tell you? Nothing happened."

"Cut the crap. I already talked to the gaki."

"Yahiko? What did he tell you?" Sano seemed concerned.

"He told me very interesting things. It's better for you and your friends if you just tell me everything you know now."

"Okay... It started yesterday morning."

*** Sano's POV***

Yahiko woke me up very early in the morning.

[How early?]

It was about 9:30. I was tired... I had been busy that night. Anyway, the kid woke me up. He seemed terrified.

"What's wrong? You look like you have seen a ghost!" I said.

Yahiko didn't say anything for quite a while. He was as pale as the sheets at the dojo after Kenshin washes them.

"Stop being such a child and tell me what happened!" Calling the kid a child has always worked to make him do things he doesn't wanna do. Well, this time he really wanted to tell me what had happened, he just didn't know where to start.

"I saw something." Yahiko said. I was beginning to think he had sneaked out of his room and found Kenshin or Kaoru, or Kenshin **and** Kaoru doing grown-up stuff. Of course, if that was the case, I had to run to the dojo and beat the crap out of Kenshin and make them get married before the day was over.

"I woke up in the middle of the night." The kid began. "And went to the bathroom. When I was coming back to my room, I saw... Something white, going in Kenshin's room. I... I... Think it was a ghost."

At first I didn't believe him... But the kid seemed pretty much terrified.

"I don't wanna ever go back there." Yahiko told me.

Of course, I can't have a gaki around my place... You see... I might get company from time to time and... Well... My place has no room for a kid. I didn't think he had actually seen a ghost. I thought the boy was dreaming...

I convinced him that he probably saw something else and I told him I would go to the dojo with him during the night, to find out exactly what he had seen. The gaki got happy with that arrangement and went... I don't know... Do the things little kids do during the day.

[What happened next?]

Well... I went to the dojo to have lunch and Kaoru was doing the cooking. I decided to leave, because it's like Hiko says: "If the Kamiya girl had been older during the Bakumatsu, there would be no need for assassins. All they had to do was to make her cook for the enemy."

[Where did you go then?]

IT'S NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS!

[Do you want me to arrest you, then?]

YEAH! ARREST ME ALREADY, INSTEAD OF ASKING STUPID QUESTIONS THAT HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH WHAT HAPPENED HERE!

[So tell me what happened here. If your story pleases me I won't arrest you.]

Okay. I came back to the dojo at dusk. Yahiko was on the yard. He seemed like he was looking for something.

"Did you lose something?" I asked.

"I can't find Busu anywhere."

"Did you look in Kenshin's room?" I joked.

"I can't find Kenshin neither."

"KAMI-SAMA! JOU-CHAN AND KENSHIN ARE HAVING AN AFFAIR!"

"Where did that come from?" Yahiko sighed. He didn't seem to think that was a possibility. He is just a kid, he doesn't understand grown-up's needs.

Then Kenshin showed up carrying a fishing rod, happy that he had caught a big one for dinner. He went into the kitchen to start preparing the fish. Just before dinner was ready, Jou-chan showed up. She was carrying a package.

I didn't ask what she had there because I'm not nosy.

[Really?]

Okay! Okay! I asked her! She told me it was none of my business. Kenshin called us for dinner and I forgot the matter. After dinner I pretended to leave, but I sneaked back, like I promised Yahiko.

Who would guess that the kid was right about the ghost?

[He was?]

Yeah! After everybody had gone to sleep, Yahiko and I hid. We saw the ghost wandering around the house. It had a white face, with red lips... Thinking about it now... The ghost looked somewhat like a geisha.

The shock of seeing the ghost was too much for the kid to handle... He fainted.

[Then what?]

I can't remember.

[How come? What did you do?]

I said I CAN'T REMEMBER!

[**You** fainted...]

...

[So, what happened when you woke up?]

It was daylight and the police officers were kicking me. Then they brought me to this room. You have nothing on me! Now let me go!

[I am not sure we should let you go... After all, you did trespass into private propriety.]

What? You can't arrest me for that! I practically live here! Ask Jou-chan!

[I'll just do that.]

Man, you really are a pain in the ass!

=========================

**Coming next: Kaoru's point of view**

"Why would I talk to you?" Kaoru asked like none of what was happening concerned her.

"I think you will." Saitou said, closing the door behind him. "That is... If you want to protect that Battousai of yours."

"Kenshin..."

"I thought so. Now start talking."

"I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I SWEAR!" Kaoru started crying.

========================

Hello, everybody! I'm happy that I got a few reviews for this...  
Koneko-dono: You have no idea how evil I intend to be. Muahahahahahaahaha!!!  
Thanks everybody for the reviews... Soon you will all know where Kaoru was and who... I mean WHAT she was doing.


	3. Kaoru

Saitou shook his head after he left the first room. Two witnesses and no real evidence. It was starting to get on his nerves. He opened the next door and stared at the person that was inside.

"I hope you are more talkative than your friends. Otherwise, we'll have a long day."

======================  
Disclaimer: Please don't make me say it! *Hana-chan starts sobbing. *  
Kenshin comes in and starts patting Hana-chan on her back.  
Kenshin: Maa maa... Don't cry, Hana-dono.  
Hana-chan: They want me to say I don't own youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!  
Kenshin lets out a relieved sigh: Thank you, Kami-sama.  
*Hana-chan glares at Kenshin with a murderous look on her face.*  
*Kenshin steps back.*  
Hana-chan: What do you mean by that?  
Kenshin: Well... Hana-dono tends to be a bit... Evil from time to time.  
*Hana-chan shots him a wicked grin.*  
Hana-chan: Oh! You have **no idea** how evil I can get!  
*Kenshin gulps and scans the room for the nearest exit, with a panicked look on his face.*  
  
================  
"Dialogs"  
'Thoughts'  
[Saitou's comments/questions]  
*** change of scene to someone's point of view***  
================

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery

Part 3: Kaoru

By Hana Himura

"Why would I talk to you?" Kaoru asked like none of what was happening concerned her.

"I think you will." Saitou said, closing the door behind him. "That is... If you want to protect that Battousai of yours."

"Kenshin..."

"I thought so. Now start talking."

"I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I SWEAR!" Kaoru started crying.

Saitou stepped back. The girl was being loud as hell. He was afraid he would go deaf from her cries.

"So, you are ready to make a full confession?" Saitou asked. It seemed that his work was almost done.

"I didn't mean to kill it!" Kaoru sobbed.

"Kill?" Saitou asked, puzzled. "Tell me what happened and who you think you killed."

"I was cooking lunch..." Kaoru began. "And Ayame and Suzume's cat showed up when I was almost done... The poor thing looked like it was starving... So I gave the cat some of the food... And the cat DIIIIIEEEEEDDDD." Kaoru was sobbing more than a mother on her little girl's wedding day. "I got so desperate that I hid the body! I SWEAR I DIDN'T MEAN TO KILL THE KITTY!"

"Okay, okay. I got it. You murdered the cat. That's not why I'm here for." Saitou said calmly.

"N-no?" Kaoru looked relieved.

She dried her tears and straightened up her figure.

"Now, tell me what happened here." Saitou said.

"What do you need to know?" Kaoru asked.

"Everything."

"Where should I start?"

"From the beginning."

"It all started when I was six years old..." Kaoru began, with a dreamy look on her eyes.

"What are you doing, Tanuki?"

"Didn't you want to know how I began to cook?"

"No. That's not it." Saitou looked like he would kill someone, but he was trying to control himself. "Just tell me about the other crime that happened here. Not the cat's murder... The **other** crime."

"Oh!!" Kaoru looked like she understood exactly what he was saying. "What crime?"

"JUST SAY WHAT YOU DID FROM YESTERDAY UNTIL THIS MOMENT!"

"Oh! Alright!"

*****Kaoru's POV*****

I woke up yesterday morning as early as usual. The birds were twittering as beautiful as always. So I lied on my futon until Yahiko came crashing in like he always do.

"Where were you last night?" He asked, looking very upset about something.

"I was here, as always. What's wrong?" I was afraid something bad had happened, like one of Kenshin's enemies showing up and challenging him for a duel... Or even worse than that.

"How on earth did you manage to sleep with all that ruckus?" Yahiko asked, a bit dumbfounded.

"What ruckus?" I asked, but it was too late. That little brat had already ran off. I began wondering what he was talking about, as I dressed myself.

When I went out of my room, there was no breakfast. I went looking for Kenshin and found out he wasn't doing laundry neither. I ran to his room, thinking that he might have left during the night, but he was there. He looked pretty tired. I decided to let him rest a little, so I decided I would cook lunch myself yesterday.

Well... With the cat's incident later on... Anyway, after I buried the kitten's body, Kenshin took over the kitchen.

[What were you doing while Battousai was using his skills where they belong?]

I was watching.

[You were watching him?]

Yes... I was still pretty much shaken from the kitten's demise... And well... It's like Hiko-san says: "with your cooking skills, Kamiya girl, you are very lucky to have here my baka deshi. He is worthless, but at least he can cook. And if you marry him, you can just as well make him do all the girl's chores while you can earn money for this twisted family of yours. Wait! That's what you've been doing for a while now, right?"

Well... I never liked Hiko-san's sayings, but I couldn't help but to think what it would be like to be married to Kenshin.

"Are you okay, Kaoru-dono?" He asked, with a concerned look on his face. I just love when he looks at me that way. Kenshin is just so adorable... Oh! Kenshin! When are you going to ask me to marry you?

[Tanuki?]

Kenshin... You are such a dimwit... Why can't we just be together?

[Wake up, Tanuki, before you get a nose bleed.]

Oh! Where was I?

"I'm fine, Kenshin." I answered.

"Would you like to go for a walk by the river after lunch, Kaoru-dono?"

I blinked. Kenshin had actually invited me to do something alone with him? It sounded very promising. If he had just shut up after he asked...

"You don't want to, Kaoru-dono? Sessha is sorry for asking. I won't bother you anymore." Kenshin said and turned to leave the kitchen. I threw a pan to his head. Of course, I regretted a second later... So I ran to Kenshin's falling body, just wishing that I hadn't killed him like the cat. He was unconscious for about five minutes. When he woke up...

"My head..." Kenshin mumbled.

"Kenshin? Are you okay?"

"My head hurts... Huh? Who are you?" He asked in pure confusion.

"What?"

"You are beautiful!"

I blushed.

"Do I know you? Where am I? What happened?" Kenshin was too confused. I was afraid I had hit him too strong on the head.

"Of course you know me! I am Kamiya Kaoru. This is the Kamiya Dojo. You live here." I tried to explain.

"Oh! Are we married?" He asked, looking at me in a funny way...

"No! We are not!" I answered, even though I wanted to say we were, just to see what he would do.

"I don't get it... You said this is **Kamiya** Dojo... You are **Kamiya** Kaoru... So I guess you live here too..." Kenshin said and I just nodded. "You live here. I live here. We are not married... Am I gay?"

"WHAT?"

"That's the only possible explanation... I live with a beautiful woman and I am not married to her... I must be gay. Look! I'm wearing a pink gi! Kami-sama! I **am** gay!"

"You are not gay!" At least I hope not, ne?

"No?" Kenshin let out a sigh of relief. "So... We have something going on?" Kenshin said coming real close, with a hungry look on his eyes.

"No..." I answered.

"No? And you are telling me I'm not gay!"

"Kenshin no baka!" I yelled hitting him on the head. Kenshin fell to the ground unconscious. I think I hit him too hard again. Because when he woke up:

"Kaoru-dono? What happened? Sessha can't remember."

At least my old Kenshin was back. The problem was that he forgot about asking me to a walk by the river... *sigh*

After that I went to town to buy a few supplies and when I came back, Kenshin was already cooking dinner. Sano and Yahiko came shorlty. We had dinner. Sano left and we all went to sleep. That's pretty much what happened.

*****Normal POV*****

"Is this your story?" Saitou asked.

"Hai..."

Saitou stared at the girl. She couldn't possibly been telling the truth.

Kaoru felt a chill ran down her spine.

"There is a small problem." Saitou said, lighting his cigarette (NOPE! No one had told him that these things cause cancer!) "Your story doesn't match with your friends'."

Kaoru gulped.  
**  
  
==================**

**Next chapter:** **Is Kaoru telling the truth?**

**Teaser**

"Don't scare me like that Kenshin!" I kept my voice down, but my heart was beating real fast.

"I am sorry, Kaoru-dono. Sessha didn't mean to scare you." He said, sweetly. "Is there a problem?"

"No... I couldn't sleep."

"Do you want me to tell you a bedtime story?" Kenshin said, with a hungry look on his eyes..

**============**

Hello, minna-san!

Before making your guesses about what happened, please remember that anyone can be lying.

I just love reviews... I look like a little girl when I read them. ^x^

Gypsy-chan: Thank you very much for your review! I was feeling a bit down and it made me very happy! In fact, it made me so happy that I decided to post this chapter one day before I was planing! By the way, I love your stories!

Bao Blossom: I know I'm mean about cliffhangers... It's just that I like to keep people interested for next chapter.

Zosocrowe: The train episode is one of my favorites... I always wondered: "where on hell did Kenshin find that horse? WOW! That's a super horse! Look how it jumps!"

Corina (Mako) Borsuk: I hate first person's point of view because in this case it's hard to write, but the plot required me to do it like this. If you don't like it, I'm sorry.


	4. Is Kaoru telling the Truth?

Saitou stared at the girl. She couldn't possibly been telling the truth.

Kaoru felt a chill ran down her spine.

"There is a small problem." Saitou said, lighting his cigarette (NOPE! No one had told him that these things cause cancer!) "Your story doesn't match with your friends'."

Kaoru gulped.

======================  
Disclaimer: Kenshin is sitting on my room and my brother walks in, eating jelly. He looks at Kenshin and says: "You are gay."  
Kenshin: "No, I'm not. It's you that is eating jelly."  
My brother: "So?"  
Kenshin: "There is nothing gayer than jelly."  
My brother: "Well... That pink shirt of yours is!"  
Kenshin: "It's not a shirt! It's a gi!"  
My brother: "Whatever! It's still gay."  
Kenshin sighs and turn to me: "Hana-dono, I'm **so** glad you don't own me... Not only you are evil, but your brother is weird. I think he'll try to make a pass on me!"  
My brother: "Hey! I'm not gay! And **you** are weird!"  
Kenshin: "I am not!"  
My brother: "Are, too!"

And they keep doing that "am not" and "are too" until they made me mad... Or at least until they make me crazy enough to write this next chapter. By the way... It's like Kenshin said: I don't own him, nor his friends.

================  
"Dialogs"  
'Thoughts'  
[Saitou's comments/questions]  
*** change of scene to someone's point of view***  
================

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery

Part 4: Is Kaoru telling the truth?

By Hana Himura

"What?" Kaoru looked like she was about to panic.

"The little boy said you weren't on your room yesterday morning. There are a lot of things that don't fit in on your story. Why don't you just tell me what really happened?"

"Okay..."

***Kaoru's POV***

I guess I'll have to tell you what I was doing the night before yesterday... Well... You remember how hot it was that night? I couldn't sleep, so I went to sit on the porch.

It was such a beautiful night. The moon was so bright in the sky...

"Are you okay, Kaoru-dono?" I heard Kenshin's voice.

"I was just feeling too hot." I smiled.

"May sessha sit down next to you?"

I nodded in response. Kenshin sat down by my side. I couldn't help but feel even hotter than before.

"It's a warm night, that it is." Kenshin said, probably noticing the sudden blush on my face.

He was just too close. I kept wondering if he would ever get the guts to kiss me. Suddenly I remembered something Hiko-san had said: "That baka deshi of mine might be brave when it comes to battles, but he is a chicken when it comes to women."

I thought that if I ever wanted him to kiss me, I would have to make the first move. So I moved a little, just enough to let my yukata open slightly. I could feel his eyes over me, as I **innocently** leaned to rest my head on his shoulder, so he could have a better 'view'.

"Kaoru-dono" Kenshin's voice was low and husky.

"Yes?" I asked, feeling my heart pounding.

"We should go to sleep."

"Kenshin no baka!" I yelled, as I punched him. Kenshin probably not even knew why I hit him...

"Oro!!"

I left to my room, without even saying goodnight to him.

I couldn't sleep, again. But this time I felt bad for what I had done. So I went to Kenshin's room to apologize. I slid the door open carefully. I didn't want to wake him, if he was already asleep. It was dark in there and took a little while until my eyes adjusted to the darkness. From the door, I couldn't see Kenshin anywhere. Then, someone came from behind and covered my mouth with one hand, as the other hand held my waist, so that I couldn't yell, nor run.

"Kaoru-dono."

I sighed in relief. It was Kenshin. He let go of me.

"Don't scare me like that Kenshin!" I kept my voice down, but my heart was beating real fast.

"I am sorry, Kaoru-dono. Sessha didn't mean to scare you." He said, sweetly. "Is there a problem?"

"No... I couldn't sleep."

"Do you want me to tell you a bedtime story?" Kenshin said, with a hungry look on his eyes.

Huh? Something was not right. That didn't sound like Kenshin at all! I woke up! I had fallen asleep on the porch. I still had my head against Kenshin's shoulder.

"Bad dream, Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin asked me politely.

I just threw my arms around Kenshin's neck and started crying. I don't know why I cried, but I just couldn't stop. I was afraid Kenshin would think I am crazy.

"It's over now..." Kenshin patted my back. He thought I was crying because of my dream.

It took a few minutes before I was able to pull myself back together.

"We should go to bed, Kaoru-dono." Kenshin said, helping me up.

We said goodnight and went to our rooms. But, like in the dream I had earlier, I couldn't sleep. So I sneaked out to Kenshin's room. He had already lied down.

"What's wrong, Kaoru-dono?" Kenshin asked.

"I can't sleep. Can I sleep here, please?"

"Oro! I don't think it's proper, Kaoru-dono..."

"No one will ever know! I just don't want to be alone!" I said.

"Is it the nightmare?" He asked, remembering what had happened earlier.

Well, it wasn't the nightmare! I haven't had any nightmare! But I just nodded, so that he would pity me and allow me inside his room.

"Okay, Kaoru-dono... But you must leave first thing in the morning." Kenshin said, making room on his futon for me.

I lied by his side, resting my head on his arm. It felt so good... I just drifted to sleep. I dreamt of... Being married to Kenshin.

I woke up with Kenshin stroking my hair gently.

"Ohayou." He whispered.

"Ohayou, Kenshin." I said. I just couldn't help but to think how it would be like to wake up everyday like that.

Kenshin leaned closer and when he was about to kiss me, the door slid open and we heard Yahiko's voice.

"Hey! Kenshin! Did you see... BUSU!? THIS IS GROSS!" And Yahiko ran away screaming.

He was screaming as much as he would probably scream if he had caught his parents in bed doing... Huh... Parents' things.

"Sessha will go talk to him, Kaoru-dono." Kenshin said, leaving me alone.

It had to happen when Kenshin was about to kiss me??? I just felt like killing Yahiko!! Wait! Yahiko isn't dead, is he? Because if he is, I didn't do it! I swear!

[No. The kid's alive.]

What a relief! You shouldn't scare people like that!

[Please continue your story.]

Well... Kenshin took a while to come home, so I had already started cooking.

"Did you find him?" I asked Kenshin, when he came into the kitchen.

"No. Sessha just hope that Yahiko isn't too upset."

"He'll get over it." I said. I was still angry at Yahiko for ruining my moment with Kenshin.

Yahiko came back just before dinner. He had Sano with him. I wondered if he had told Sano anything. I guess not, because Sano is no good at keeping secrets, and he acted as if nothing had happened. Thinking about it, so did Yahiko and Kenshin...

After dinner I went to my room and Kenshin showed up a little later.

"Kaoru-dono... Sessha was hoping we could discuss what happen earlier." Kenshin said.

'What is he going to say?' I asked myself. I thought he would just say:

'Kaoru-dono. I love you. Why don't we get married?'

But instead, he said:

"Kaoru-dono, I'm very sorry for what happened. Thanks to Yahiko sessha didn't do something really improper. I hope you can forgive me."

I couldn't help but:

"KENSHIN NO BAKA!"

And Kenshin couldn't help but:

"ORO!" As I hit him on the head.

I threw Kenshin out of my room that instant. I hope he fries in hell! WAIT! HE IS NOT DEAD, IS HE?

[I hope not. I want to be the one to kill him.]

Well... I don't think I have anything else to say.

**============  
Coming next: Kenshin's POV!  
Preview:**

"Kaoru-dono! Wasn't it my turn at making lunch?" I asked. We actually don't have turns to cook, but whenever Kaoru-dono is cooking, someone is always complaining. I hate to see that hurt look on Kaoru's face when someone talks bad about her cooking.

"I thought of cooking something nice today and giving you some time off." Kaoru said.

**============**

Hello people!!! I'm always so happy when I get reviews! It makes me feel like... Writing more! I'm currently writing chapter 6. It's being hard to write. So, I would appreciate if you **review** this chapter. And maybe if you read my little answers to reviews you can get a clue from what is happening.

Zosocrowe: Yeah! I know that game! But here in Brazil it's called 'detetive' (which obviously mean detective). It was my favorite game when I was ten...

Bao Blossom: I'm not **that** violent! (just a little bit. But... 'Just a little bit' is what I always answer when someone asks me if I can speak English... So I'll leave it up to you to figure out if I'm violent or not! Heheehehe). By the way! I thought about you when I wrote something for next chapter. You said you are hispanica, so instead of writing a little something in Portuguese for one of my little jokes, I wrote it in Spanish (I guess more people would know what I was saying. heheheeh)

Anna: Thanks for saying that you like Hiko's sayings, because it has been a nightmare to write those!


	5. Kenshin

Saitou opened the door and smiled evilly. Now that was going to be a lot of fun.

"Ahou." He said.

======================  
Disclaimer: Kaoru looks at the drafts that are next to the computer. She starts blushing.  
Kaoru: Hana-chan? I'll really have to do this?  
Hana-chan looks at her smiling and nods. Kaoru's face becomes even redder.  
Hana-chan: What? You don't like it? I can change it if you don't.  
Kaoru picks up her bokken: Don't you dare change it, Hana-chan! It's the only way I can get some action!  
Hana-chan steps back, because she doesn't want to get hit on the head with a bokken (let's save that for Yahiko).  
Hana-chan: uh... Okay... I guess you liked it. I wonder what you would think if I wrote a lemon.  
Kaoru: WHAT? YOU CAN WRITE ME A LEMON??? YES!!!!  
Hana-chan sweat-drops: I guess living with Kenshin have made her a bit... sexually frustrated.  
I don't own Rurouni Kenshin! And I don't write lemons! (so, don't ask me to do it!)  
================  
"Dialogs"  
'Thoughts'  
[Saitou's comments/questions]  
*** change of scene to someone's point of view***  
================

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery

Part 5: Kenshin

By Hana Himura

"Saitou." Himura Kenshin stared at him with cold eyes.

Saitou looked very amused to find Kenshin standing on that room. Kenshin moved his hand to his sword's hilt.

"I did not come here to fight, Battousai." Saitou said, after a minute. "I'm here to solve a crime. And you are going to be collaborative."

"What makes you think I will?"

"You will... If you want to help your Tanuki girlfriend. Now talk."

'Talk about what?' Kenshin asked himself.

'He looks clueless.' Saitou thought. 'Why do they always look like this when I am questioning them?'

"I know nothing about your crime." Kenshin said.

"Doesn't matter. You must provide yourself an alibi. So, tell me what you did yesterday. From the moment you woke up, until this morning."

Kenshin cleared his throat and began his story.

***** Kenshin's POV *****

Sessha woke up early. There are a lot of chores that must be done in the morning. However, I couldn't do any of those. As I woke up, Kaoru-dono came into my room and asked me if I had heard something the previous night.

She thought that there could have been a mouse on the house. Kaoru-dono is afraid of those. Once she woke sessha during the night so that I could chase a mouse on her bedroom... But unfortunately, I couldn't find the rodent.

This second time I thought she was imagining things. But just to be sure, sessha decided to borrow Ayame and Suzume's cat, since the little cat was always very fond of chasing mice. So sessha left to get the cat and when I got back, Kaoru-dono was already cooking lunch.

"Kaoru-dono! Wasn't it my turn at making lunch?" I asked. We actually don't have turns to cook, but whenever Kaoru-dono is cooking, someone is always complaining. I hate to see that hurt look on Kaoru's face when someone talks bad about her cooking.

"I thought of cooking something nice today and giving you some time off." Kaoru said.

"Great! Now I can do the laundry!" I said turning to leave.

"Kenshin no baka! You are supposed to rest!"

"Oro! Why would I want to rest?"

"Huh? I don't know! You might need your energy later!" Was Kaoru blushing? Or was she just feeling hot? She did look very nice that day. Who was I kidding? She looked **hot**. I guess I might have stared at her too long, because:

"Kenshin! You pervert!!!"

All I could do was "oro" while she threw pans at me. Then it got worse… all the movement made her kimono open a little. I closed my eyes and prepared for impact when I said:

"Kaoru-dono! Your Kimono…"

"KENSHIN NO HENTAI!!!!!" she yelled even louder then before. I waited for the physical punishment, but it never came… instead…

"Noooooo!"

I opened my eyes and I saw Kaoru, leaning over the cat's dead body.

"Oro?! Was the cat hit by a pan?"

Kaoru glared at me. Then her face twitched into a painful expression.

"The kitty died from my cooking!" Kaoru started crying. I could never stand her crying. I held her as she cried her eyes out. "Yahiko and Sanosuke were right! My food really is poison!"

"Maa maa… don't talk like this, Kaoru-dono… sessha enjoys your cooking!"

"You are just saying that!!"

"No… the cat was very old…maybe it died from natural causes…" Sessha tried to convince her, even though that was not true.

"Really?" She grabbed onto my gi.

"Hai."

"Thank you, Kenshin." She said. Her warm breath on my neck was making me feel… things. That was too close, so I just had to ruin the moment.

"Kaoru-dono? We should bury the cat."

"Oh! You are right. We don't want Ayame and Suzume coming over and finding their poor pet…dead... Deceased... Muerto... Finito... Kaput..."

"Kaoru-dono, I think you are dellusional... You are talking funny."

So, Kaoru left to bury the cat and I quickly disposed the food she had cooked. Thank Kami-sama for Hiten Mitsurugi Ryu, because otherwise I wouldn't be able to make lunch so fast. I hope Shishou never hear this, but I guess he wouldn't be surprised. Because it's like he says: "I should never had picked such a baka deshi! Your only real utility is buying sake and cooking."

After lunch I washed the dishes and helped Kaoru-dono cleaning the dojo. Yahiko wasn't there. He had left for the Akabeko in the morning. Sessha thinks the boy really need some time off, but Kaoru doesn't like the idea. I overheard her saying to Tae-san that the way things were going Yahiko would probably be married before her.

Sessha has no idea why Kaoru-dono is so concerned about marriage.

After cleaning the dojo, I did the laundry and prepared Kaoru-dono's bath before making dinner.

Yahiko then came home and decided he wanted to do a little guy-to-guy conversation about girls.

"Oro! Why do you want to talk to sessha about it??"

"It's easy! You have both Megumi and Tanuki at your feet! Not to mention the looks you get from all women we pass by when we go to the market or to eat at the Akabeko!" Yahiko said.

"That is not true… I'm not that popular…"

"Oh! Yes, you are! You should see what Tanuki and Megumi talk when you are not around!"

That definitely got my attention. I asked what it was that they talked.

"They talk about your butt… they think you are cute and you have the cutest butt. I honestly don't see what they see in your butt, 'cause a butt is a butt, right?"

If he said the word 'butt' one more time I'd most certainly have thrown up. It's probably from all the exercise… or wandering through the country for ten years that got my body at a certain fit that according to Yahiko made me irresistible for women.

Sessha's life would be so easy if his words were true…

Sano came shortly after and started teasing Yahiko about Tsubame. I'll have to thank him later, because that talk with Yahiko was making me really uncomfortable. Sano stayed for dinner, than he left.

After having dinner, Kaoru-dono was very tired so we went to sleep.

[Together?]

Oro! What do you think I am? I care for Kaoru-dono's reputation. Sessha does not wish to throw mud at her family's good name.

[Okay, so you went to sleep, separately. Then what?]

Then nothing. I woke up this morning and started making breakfast. A while later the police came by and started talking about a crime, but they didn't tell us what it was. They said we were all witnesses and took us to separate rooms.

[Is this all you have to say?]

Hai.

[Well… your story doesn't match your girlfriend's]

What do you mean?

[The Tanuki told me a completely different story. Are you saying that she lied, or are you lying?

===================

**Next Chapter: Kenshin's Lies**

**Preview:**

"Sessha can make you some tea..."

"It's too hot for tea."

She was right... Too hot for tea. It was too hot just to sit next to her, for Kami's sake! 'Think about cool things, Himura...' I told myself. 'Snow falling... It's much better... What else is cool? Water. Rain! Rain is cool. Rain falling... Kaoru-dono standing on the rain... Her kimono clinching to her body... This is not helping...'

===================

Hello, minna-san! Just two more chapters to go! I'm working hard on chapter 7 right now (my brother read it and said it wasn't good. He said there was too much waff... I know people like waff, I do too, but he said it was too much). I'm rewriting it and I expect it to be finished soon. Honestly, I never thought I'd write a fanfiction so quickly. I already have an idea for the next one (I think I enjoy torturing Kenshin). Chapter 6 will be posted as soon as I finish rewriting chapter 7. Okay? I guess it won't be too long. Thanks to everybody who reviewed last chapter. I promise next one will be worth the wait!

Sorry for my bad spelling in languages that I don't actually know!!!!!

**Please review! Thank you!**


	6. Kenshin's lies

"Well... Your story doesn't match your girlfriend's"

"What do you mean?" Kenshin's eyes were wide open.

"The Tanuki told me a completely different story. Are you saying that she lied, or are you lying?"

"I wasn't talking about that. What do you mean by 'your girlfriend'?"

======================  
Disclaimer: Hana-chan's brother and Kenshin are siting in her room, eating jelly, while she writes the third version for the same chapter.  
Kenshin: It tastes good, that it does.  
Hana-chan's onii-chan: Yeah. You got the blue one. The blue one is better. Give it to me!  
Kenshin: No. Sessha like this one.  
The two start fighting over the jelly.  
Hana-chan: You two! Stop it already! You are supposed to help me writing this!  
Hana-chan's onii-chan: Okay... Have the blue one... The red one is tasteful too... Hmm... Jelly is good. Hey! Do you want to play Playstation 2?  
Kenshin: hm... Okay?  
Hana-chan: No way, mister! You have to help me!  
Kenshin: Sorry, Hana-dono... You are just too mean to me... Your brother gives me jelly.  
Hana-chan: You want jelly? I'll write you tons of jelly! Just help me! Please!  
Kenshin: Maybe sessha can help you if you help sessha.  
Hana-chan: Okay, what do you want?  
Kenshin whisper something to Hana-chan.  
Hana-chan's eyes pop wide, anime style: You want **that**?  
Kenshin: It would make sessha very happy.  
Hana-chan: Okay... But Saitou won't like it... I mean... Not all tough guys like to wear feathers and pink high heels... But what the hell! I don't own Rurouni Kenshin! Therefore, he can't be mad with me! hehehehehehehehe

================  
"Dialogs"  
'Thoughts'  
[Saitou's comments/questions]  
*** change of scene to someone's point of view***  
================

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery

Part 6: Kenshin's lies

By Hana Himura

"Girlfriend or not, you certainly care for the girl. So, why don't you tell the truth and provide the girl her alibi?" Saitou said.

'Oro! I have to protect Kaoru-dono! It looks like she is in trouble!' Kenshin thought.

This is your damn fault, you moron! His Battousai side scolded at him.

Kenshin sighed.

"Okay... Sessha will talk..."

***Kenshin's POV***

The day before yesterday had been very hot. If it wasn't for the laundry, sessha would probably had melted from the heat. Sleeping when the weather is that warm is almost impossible.

So, sessha went to the roof, in order to get a little cooler with the night's breeze. It was full moon. I heard a noise and, when I turned to look, there she was... An angel under the moonlight.

"Kaoru-dono?"

"Do you mind if I sit with you for a while, Kenshin?" she asked, coming closer.

"Couldn't sleep either, Kaoru-dono?"

Kaoru shook her head.

"Sessha can make you some tea..."

"It's too hot for tea."

She was right... Too hot for tea. It was too hot just to sit next to her, for Kami's sake! 'Think about cool things, Himura...' I told myself. 'Snow falling... It's much better... What else is cool? Water. Rain! Rain is cool. Rain falling... Kaoru-dono standing on the rain... Her kimono clinching to her body... This is not helping...'

Kaoru-dono leaned against my arm. Her yukata was a little loose and I was higher than she... 'Think... There must be something... mm... Think... Aoshi meditating... Sano eating? Nah... It's still not working. What else??? Shishio kissing Yume! URGH! This is better than a cold shower! That image will die with me! It's like printed in my brain... Nothing can be more turning off than that. Disgusting!' I finally eased my inner battle.

"Kenshin... I was thinking." Kaoru came to a more 'proper' posture. It was a relief to not be able to see the curve of her breast. "We know each other for a long time now, right?" Kaoru-dono was obvious oblivious to my thoughts.

"H-hai..." I was very afraid of what she would say next.

"Don't you think it's about time you..."

'I do what? Profess my undying love for you? Take you in my arms and kiss you? Oh-oh... This thoughts are not helping... It's getting worse than before! Just listen to what she is saying and think... Shishio... Oh, my... It's not working... The guy was almost burnt to death and still was getting some. Why is this happening to me??? WHY???' My mind was screaming.

"Well... I think it's about time you stop being so formal towards me... I think it's very awkward that you still call me 'dono'." Kaoru said.

Okay. It was much better... No words of affection, just the plain request to drop a little of the politeness. There was only one problem... Sessha happens to like the 'dono'. Calling her just plain Kaoru it's like saying we are intimate. It sounded like soon I'd have to start to bring her breakfast in bed...

"Kenshin? Are you listening?" Kaoru asked, tugging to my sleeve.

"Hai, Kaoru-dono."

"BAKA! What have I just said?"

"No 'dono'?" Sessha said, bracing himself for impact.

"Mou! Sometimes I think you pretend not to listen just to not do what you don't feel like it! So, will you do it?"

'Kaoru.' It sounded good. Natural. Who am I kidding? Still need to attach something to her name... Kaoru-san? No, she would kick me out of the roof. Kaoru-koishii? WAY TOO INTIMATE! But Kaoru-dono is a great way to call her. It's polite. It's respectful.

"Kenshin? I'm talking to you!"

What to do? Can't panic, Himura... It's a long way down... I'd probably die if she threw me off the roof. Of course, any person falling from this roof normally would probably have a few scratches, maybe a sprained ankle. The worse possibility would be a broken bone. But if you consider Kaoru-dono mad... Adding the gravity... It would be certain death. What would be the odds? Surviving the Bakumatsu to die falling from a roof...

"Kenshin!"

I was thinking so hard to not to panic that I panicked! Just grabbed Kaoru and kissed her hard, until oxygen lacked and I had to let her go.

"Sorry... Sessha likes the 'dono', Kaoru-dono."

Kaoru was staring at space. Her eyes were wide and she seemed emotionless.

"Kaoru? Kaoru-dono?" Sessha called her.

She looked at me and then... Fainted. I caught her, so that she wouldn't fall. Kaoru-dono is just so beautiful. Her skin is so perfect... Her hair is perfect. Her body is perfect. Yup! That's it... Sessha is in love.

I had to wake Kaoru. There wasn't water on the roof, so that was not an option. Slap her? No... That was not an option either. Couldn't bring myself to do this to Kaoru. Kiss her again? It works on fairy tales... Why not? She would probably just wake up to yell: 'Kenshin no hentai' and hit me. Okay, there was only one option left. I shook her awake.

"Stop!!!!!" Kaoru cried after a few shakes.

I stopped immediately.

"What did just happen?" Kaoru asked.

"Sessha panicked?"

She gave me a funny look, as if she didn't believe me.

"Why would you panic?" She asked.

"Because... Because... Sesshaisinlovewithyoudegozaruyo."

"What?"

"NOTHING!" I was panicking again... Who would guess that women made the Battousai so nervous? Well it was not any woman. It was Kaoru-dono.

"Did you say... You are in love with me?"

She heard! Total panic! Deny everything!

"Aa." Damn! Weak man! You can not even deny to your one true love that you love her? Okay, it doesn't make any sense.

"Kenshin... I love you too." She said, smiling.

Panic melted away. 'She loves me! She loves me!' My mind kept singing. But then... She loves me? Sessha has nothing to offer her... She deserves so much better. A younger wealthier man, who can give her everything. Someone without enemies to endanger her life.

She kept staring at me. Waiting for me to say something. I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out of it. Panicked again! Just pulled Kaoru closer and kissed her, more passionately than the first time.

I don't know why Kami-sama made people need to breathe. I mean, with our lips busy, there is no need to talk. Again I had to stop kissing her so that we could breathe. This was turning to become a torture. Not only sessha was feeling hotter than before, but Kaoru kept staring at me with those beautiful, innocent, lustful eyes... Did I say lustful? Forget about the politeness and the proper! Let's burn down this roof! No... Control yourself, Himura...

"I think we should go to sleep, Kaoru-dono. It's getting late."

So we left the roof and headed for our rooms, or so I thought, because:

"Oro! What are you doing here, Kaoru-dono?"

"You said **we** should go to sleep."

"What I meant was: you should go to sleep on your room, while sessha goes to sleep here."

"I don't want to be away from you. Please, let me stay... I just want to sleep next to you."

Kaoru looked at me with puppy eyes and sessha, like the weak man he is when it comes to Kaoru-dono, just couldn't say no to her.

It was like a night spent in hell. There she was, lying on my arms, smelling like jasmine and all sessha could do was look at her sleeping face and try not to feel her soft skin against mine. It felt like my skin was burning. It was a very distressing night. It was almost dawn when I finally was able to sleep.

I woke up with soft kisses on my face. Yes, that's an evil young woman. She just wouldn't allow me to sleep. At least one good thing came from it... Making out. But that didn't last long, because we were busted. Yahiko had opened the door, like he often does on the mornings.

"KENSHIN! KAORU! What do you think you are doing?! I'm going to throw up!" And Yahiko left, screaming like a little girl.

"Mou! I can't even have some privacy on my own home! That little brat!" Kaoru was angry. That was very bad. I decided for the best solution of all: stay the hell away from her until she calmed down.

"Sessha will look for Yahiko."

Yahiko was nowhere to be found in the house. So I decided to kill two rabbits with a single blow.

[Don't you mean stone?]

It's easier when you use a sword.

So I went to buy supplies and look for Yahiko. Sessha was almost sure to find Yahiko at the Akabeko, but he wasn't there when I dropped by. When I got back, Kaoru was already making lunch... You know... The whole little-cat-getting-killed-by-Kaoru's-cooking incident.

On the afternoon, I thought I'd go fishing. I spent the afternoon fishing and came home on time to make dinner. Yahiko had come home. We started talking... uh... That birds and bees kinda talk.

"GROSS!" It was Yahiko's favorite word during my brief explanation on why sessha was... Err... Being so forward towards Kaoru-dono.

"How can someone enjoy exchanging saliva? Specially with a ugly old hag?" Yahiko asked.

Thank Kami that Sano came before I had to answer that question. Sessha thinks that Yahiko might suffer from the most severe case of myopia ever reported in the history of mankind.

Sano thought Yahiko was asking me how he should kiss Tsubame and stated teasing him about it.

Kaoru wasn't home by that time, but she came back just before dinner was ready. After dinner she went straight to bed... MY BED! When I got to my room I saw that I was in for another long night...

Kaoru was already asleep, so sessha decided it would be for the best to sleep sitting against the wall.

So, as you see, Kaoru was in my room the past two nights, so she couldn't commit any crime you are implying she did.

*****Normal POV*****

"How did you know it happened during the night?" Saitou asked visibly amused.

"Ano... Don't all crimes usually happen in the night?"

"Not all crimes. By the way, it was a very colorful lie you did there." Saitou grinned.

"Thank you. Sessha is very proud of it."

**================**

Hello, minna-san! No teaser for next chapter... I don't want to give away the conclusion just yet, ne? Anyway, next chapter is the last, so now is time to make your guesses. Just a little something... can someone tell me how Misao calls Kaoru? (Is it Kaoru-san, Kaoru-chan? I don't know. No, it's not for this fic... it's for something else I'm writing. I think I will have Misao and Aoshi making showing up at my next fanfiction).

Bao Blossom: Thank you! Thank you! You are very nice! I understood everything! My brother said: "why are all your reviewers always asking you to hit me? I just said the truth, Kenshin is gay and the chapter had a little too much waff." I had to hit him on the head for the 'Kenshin is gay' part...

But otherwise, I couldn't keep the waff, but I think I did a good last chapter... It will be on fanfiction.net by the end of the week. **So please review, 'cause the more you review, the sooner conclusion will be posted!!!!**

**Thanks everybody!!!!!!**


	7. Guess who?

"How did you know it happened during the night?" Saitou asked visibly amused.

"Ano... Don't all crimes usually happen in the night?"

"Not all crimes. By the way, it was a very colorful lie you did there." Saitou grinned.

"Thank you. Sessha is very proud of it."

======================  
Disclaimer: Hana-chan sits on her room, writing on a notebook, with an anxious look on her face. She finishes what she is  
writing and closes the notebook with a snap.  
Hana-chan: Finally! Now I can go to chapter 7!  
Kenshin and her brother walk in. Yep! They are eating jelly again...  
Kenshin, with the spoon still on his mouth: Hana-dono, I think you are overdoing it.  
Hana-chan: What? Why?  
Kenshin: Well, you wrote three chapters in 24 hours. If you go on like this, you will turn into a zombie.  
Hana-chan stare at her brother with her best hitokiri glare.  
Hana-chan: Onii-chan! I told you! No zombie games for Kenshin!  
Hana-chan's brother: But he likes it! He even tried that Hiten Mitsurugi stuff on your videogame.  
Hana-chan: WHAT?  
Hana-chan's brother: Oh! He broke it, by the way.  
Hana-chan falls down, anime style.  
Hana-chan's brother: I wanna see what else he can break... Can I let him drive your car?  
Hana-chan gets up quickly, picks up Kenshin and lock him in the closet.  
Hana-chan: There is no way you are going to break my Kenshin like you do with all my other toys!  
Hana-chan's brother: I guess you don't need to worry, sis. You don't own Rurouni Kenshin. So, can I play with him until the owner claims it?  
Hana-chan: NO WAY! You will get him speaking slangs at no time!

Kamiya Dojo's Mystery

Part 7: Guess who?

By Hana Himura

"That full moon part gave you away. It won't be full moon until the day after tomorrow. So, why did you do it?" Saitou asked.

"Sessha was bored." Kenshin smiled his rurouni smile.

"So, you confess?"

"Yes. Sessha lied to the _good police officer_ and will not tell him the truth." Kenshin said.

"Why not?"

"I can't tell you the truth without consulting Kaoru-dono first."

"Okay, okay... Come with me." Saitou called, opening the door. "We are going to try something different."

Saitou took Kenshin to the dojo, where they found Yahiko.

"Kenshin! You are alive!" The boy screamed in joy.

Saitou told the police officer that was standing there to gather the other 'witnesses' and soon Sano and Kaoru had joined them.

"It's been an interesting morning. I've heard some interesting stories, none of those were truth."

"What are you talking about? I didn't lie!" Sanosuke snapped.

Saitou looked at Sano for a second, before answering:

"Somehow I believe you. You are too stupid to lie."

"WHAT?!" Sano looked as if he were about to jump at Saitou's throat. Kaoru and Kenshin had to contain him.

"As I was saying, you all gave me interesting stories, not two of them alike. I'll tell you what I learnt from them. The little boy walked on Tanuki and Battousai playing little rabbits." Saitou said and was glared by Yahiko, Kenshin and Kaoru. "He got freaked out and ran to the stupid rooster head. But he might have had second thoughts just before telling what happened, and made up a story about a ghost. Did I get this right until now?"

Yahiko, Kenshin and Kaoru nodded, all of them as red as lobsters.

"Then she cooked and her food poisoned the cat." Saitou pointed at Kaoru.

"WHAT? Jou-chan's food has been proven poisonous??" Sano blurted.

"I knew it! She is trying to kill us!" Yahiko mocked.

"SHUT UP!" Kaoru yelled, running to get a bokken from the supports on the wall, but was interrupted by Kenshin placing an arm on her way. Kaoru looked at him and decided to keep quiet.

"What else? Battousai went fishing and all of you ate dinner together. There is nothing else I can get from your twisted stories... Or should I say, 'lies'. None of you spoke of the crime."

"Mou! I wonder why... Maybe it's because we not even know what crime is that!" Kaoru said.

"Yes. Why don't you tell us about this crime and maybe we can tell you if we know something?" Kenshin said.

"Something has been stolen." Saitou said, calmly.

"What?" Yahiko ventured to ask.

"MY CLOAK!" Hiko's voice echoed like a thunder through the dojo. All of them turned to see Hiko walking in. "It's the last time I come for a visit. I come here and get my things stolen."

"Shishou! Why didn't you ask me about it?!" Kenshin asked, on a high pitched voice.

"But my cloak disappeared!"

"I was going to return it! I'd just wash it before!" Kenshin said.

"Haven't I taught you nothing? You must **ask** people before you take their belongings!" Hiko retorted.

"I thought you wouldn't know it was gone... Not with the amount of sake sessha gave you...."

"You are under arrest, Battousai." Saitou said, his face was emotionless but there was amusement on his voice.

"No! You can't arrest him! It was my fault!" Kaoru jumped between Saitou and Kenshin.

"Explain how it was your fault, Tanuki." Saitou said, lighting his cigarette.

"I asked for the cloak!" Kaoru said, looking down.

"Why would you want Kenshin to get the cloak?" Yahiko asked.

Kaoru would be glad if a hole appeared on the floor and sucked her in. She never felt so embarrassed on her entire life.

"I wanted... Uh... Because... Because..." Kaoru began.

"Oh! I think she was being naughty! So... Jou-chan has the hots for Hiko!" Sano teased.

"If you want to, Kamiya girl, we could..." Hiko started, his ego had reached the size of Japan.

"IT'S NOT HIKO-SAN! IT'S THE CLOAK!" Kaoru yelled like a hysterical woman.

"The cloak?" Hiko and Sano both asked at the same time.

"Well... You see... It's just that the cloak seemed so... Soft and powerful and... Sexy." Kaoru hid her red face on her hands.

"Disgusting!" Yahiko didn't understand what they were talking about, but thought that word should fit the circumstances. "But why did she want the cloak?"

Sano shook his head.

"Kenshin... I thought you had talked to this little brat yesterday on the ways of women." Sano sighed, then whispered something on Yahiko's ear.

"GROSS!" Yahiko said.

"But what about the geisha?" Sano asked.

Now Kaoru really wanted to disappear. She looked for a place to hide, but found none.

"Ano... Sessha is the one to blame for that... You see... I was too young during the Bakumatsu and none of my comrades ever brought me along to a tea house. So I always kept wondering." Kenshin looked as red as his hair.

"Why didn't you tell me about that? I'd show you where the real geishas are." Sanosuke patted Kenshin on the back, almost knocking him over.

"You will find a geisha on a _tea house_, Sano, not a _whorehouse._" Yahiko said.

"Since when little brats are supposed to know things like this?" Sano replied and they started fighting.

"I guess my work here is done." Saitou said. "I'll have to bring Tanuki in as an accomplice."

"What? You can't arrest them!" Sano said, stopping the fight with Yahiko.

"Yeah! It's a cloak! You can't arrest them over a cloak!" Yahiko yelled.

"Take them already." Hiko said.

Saitou took Kenshin and Kaoru away. Hiko went to the kitchen to get his sake, Sano and Yahiko followed him.

"I can't believe you are going to let them be arrested over a stupid cloak!" Sano yelled.

"I liked that cloak. Now it's ruined." Hiko said and sipped his sake.

"But still..." Yahiko said.

"Calm down... I just think that a night in jail can make them elaborate a new fantasy. One that doesn't require other people's clothes, mine specially." Hiko said with a wicked grin.

FIM (The End)

==============

Hello, minna-san! Thank you all for reading and please review! If I get enough reviews to make me happy, probably I'll write down another idea that popped into my head.

Bao Blossom: My onii-chan is 25, but sometimes he acts like he was fifteen.

Thanks to everybody who reviewed. Reviewers are the best people in the whole wide world!!!!! I love you!!!!!! (I guess Brazilian people are over emotive, ne?)


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